A 2024 study from the American Psychological Association reports that US teens spend nearly 5 hours per day on social media. That statistic certainly says something about the ever-present nature of technology in our children's lives. It also says something disturbing about the addictive design of social media algorithms. Simply stated, social media app developers prioritize gaining our children's attention over ensuring their well-being. It's our job as parents and educators, therefore, to guide our children towards a more balanced use. But how do we teach kids to resist such a powerful pull?

In a recent editorial in the New York Times, Dr. Angela Duckworth, a professor of psychology at the University of Pennsylvania, offers reassurance to those of us who struggle to create better habits, whether for ourselves or for their children. Her groundbreaking idea? Willpower is not enough. "Successful people rarely rely on inner fortitude to resist temptations," she writes. "Instead, many exercise situational agency, arranging their lives to minimize the need for willpower in the first place." A basic example of situational agency: More people incorporate a workout into their daily routines if they go to the gym on the way home; it's just harder to get back out once you've made it through that front door. The same principles apply to our recreational use of tech.

The temptation to pick up the phone and scroll through TikTok (Instagram, etc.) can be strong. And once our eyes are on the screen, time blurs, slipping away in what feels like a moment. Gone for that afternoon or evening, then, is the opportunity to do something healthier for the mind or body, like exercise or reading, like spending time with others or simply thinking about the day you just had. The opportunity to do something that will give us more nourishment than the empty calories of TikTok, Instagram, or YouTube Shorts (Cal Newport, a computer scientist, has labeled TikTok content a "digital Dorito"). And let's face it, if we adults can be pulled into such a brain-dimming cycle, imagine how susceptible our children are. But it's unlikely our children will set their own limits, not in the face of social media's pull. Setting those limits--and creating situational agency for our children--is up to us. We recommend keeping open communication with your child, and setting enforceable limits on the time your children can be online. Another step is to take the phone away, possibly at a certain time every afternoon or evening. Restricting access to social media altogether is always recommended, especially for younger children. In Europe, TikTok is restricted for children under 13. Age verification, however, is inconsistent at best.

Culture Reframed recently published an article about TikTok, in which they lay out some alarming social media risks for children. "Your teen might open TikTok to watch dance trends or comedy clips," they write, "but within a few swipes, they could be seeing content about 'body counts,' hookup 'rules,' or appearance-based rating scales." The article summarizes a 2025 investigation by UK-based Global Witness: "Researchers created brand-new TikTok accounts on factory-reset phones, set the age to 13, and turned on Restricted Mode — a tool that is supposed to limit mature or sexual content. Yet sexualized search suggestions appeared before the accounts typed anything into the search bar, and some accounts reached pornographic content in as few as two clicks." The article also details some of the harmful impacts on emotions and behavior that overly sexualized content can have on children, as well as steps parents can take to check in with and protect them.

AAS parents, please know that you have resources and partners in this crucial safeguarding task. Culture Reframed and Common Sense Media offer multiple tools and resources to support children's safe, responsible tech use. Closer to home, the British Embassy is co-sponsoring a public event here in Sofia next week: "Beyond the Screens: How to Preserve Childhood in the Digital World." Participation is free, with prior registration. And, of course, AAS is a willing, committed partner in this endeavor, as well. If you have concerns or questions about your child's online safety or experiences, please reach out to your child's teacher or school counselor at any time.