"Worrying is like paying a debt you don't owe." -- Mark Twain

As school counselor, I'm involved in a lot of different transitions. And it's definitely that time of year: Grade 5 students are getting ready to move up to Middle School, for example, and grade 8s are preparing for High School. The students are, of course, accompanied by their families,  joining in for the ups and downs that will accompany those big divisional milestones. There are also a number of families who are saying good-bye to our community, whether it's because they're celebrating a graduating 12th grader or because they're moving on to different communities in a different city and country. And then, the last mentioned but certainly not the least important, there are those of us who are staying behind, saying farewell to people who have been part of our AAS family for who knows how long.

A lot of change, impacting a lot of people.

With change comes a certain level of uncertainty, and with uncertainty comes the potential for worry. Worry, however, is wasted effort. Our energy is better used by remembering that we can control some things, but not all. Our kids may need our help figuring this out. That help may be as intangible as a few encouraging words, or it may be something more proactive, like a T-chart with 'Can control / Can't control' at the top of the two columns. And while everyone's list might look a little different, there will likely be some similarities, at least as pertains to moving away from AAS.

Being part of a community for an extended period of time means forming significant relationships. Showing appreciation and gratitude for those people who have mattered to us can be an important step in gaining some closure. An extension of expressing appreciation for those meaningful people in our lives is the explicit act of saying good-bye, part of which can include setting up time to be together before the big departure and also arranging for ways to keep in touch. 

As some of you may already know, effective closure on one experience has a way of opening us to opportunities in our new lives and communities. And so looking ahead to our future destinations can be a helpful step towards dispelling some of the uncertainty: What questions do we have about the new school, city, country, and are there some easy-to-find answers? What opportunities await? What is there to look forward to? Anticipating some hard times can be wise, as well (which, technically, doesn't count as a worry, since there's a high probability that not everything will go smoothly). What will you do if a problem arises? Who's in your support network, whether near or far, that you'll turn to for help?

One more word about worry, in case anything I've written has sounded dismissive: Despite it being a poor use of our energy, worry isn't always easy to control, and it can still overwhelm many of us from time to time. If your upcoming move is causing you or your child more anxiety than feels comfortable to deal with on your own, please reach out to us. Your child's counselor and teachers are here to help.